Transcript
WEBVTT
00:00:18.373 --> 00:00:19.794
Come on, come on.
00:00:19.794 --> 00:00:23.096
Ready Tone buried him on the front lawn, put up a tombstone.
00:00:23.096 --> 00:00:25.557
I seen Bambi that's my nickname for bamboo.
00:00:25.557 --> 00:00:26.542
She like what up?
00:00:26.542 --> 00:00:28.865
Tone, how you can we speak?
00:00:28.865 --> 00:00:30.567
I got some explaining to do.
00:00:30.567 --> 00:00:34.243
See, your absence made me forget who you are and I love you.
00:00:34.243 --> 00:00:35.768
For you, I need a second chance.
00:00:35.768 --> 00:00:37.024
Boo, I said it's all good.
00:00:37.024 --> 00:00:41.069
36 seasons long, you got weak, but I'm here to help weather the storm.
00:01:32.784 --> 00:01:33.634
What we do in life echoes in eternity.
00:01:33.634 --> 00:01:34.140
See you next time, yuck.
00:01:37.552 --> 00:01:39.281
Yuck, one of those yuck days.
00:01:39.301 --> 00:01:39.621
Are you okay?
00:01:39.621 --> 00:01:40.403
Is this a sunglass episode?
00:01:40.403 --> 00:01:40.942
Am I fucking mic on?
00:01:40.942 --> 00:01:41.524
Yeah, your mic's on.
00:01:41.524 --> 00:01:41.983
Sorry, it's loud.
00:01:41.983 --> 00:01:42.906
Is this a sunglass episode?
00:01:42.906 --> 00:01:43.365
Yeah, it mic'd on.
00:01:43.506 --> 00:01:44.307
Yeah, your mic's on.
00:01:44.307 --> 00:01:45.028
Sorry, it's loud.
00:01:45.227 --> 00:01:46.569
Is this a sunglass episode?
00:01:46.650 --> 00:01:47.891
Yeah, it seems that way.
00:01:47.891 --> 00:01:49.894
You got yours, I got some for you.
00:01:50.135 --> 00:01:51.156
No, I'm all right, come on.
00:01:52.823 --> 00:01:53.487
No, I'm good.
00:01:57.805 --> 00:01:58.966
I've got clear ones in the bag.
00:01:58.986 --> 00:01:59.527
Are you going to be cunty?
00:01:59.527 --> 00:02:00.688
Tonight this is how we're going to start.
00:02:00.709 --> 00:02:04.293
Yeah, I'd have to go get some.
00:02:04.394 --> 00:02:05.034
You want my broken?
00:02:05.094 --> 00:02:05.215
ones.
00:02:09.366 --> 00:02:10.449
Well, no, not if he's not going to do it.
00:02:10.449 --> 00:02:12.013
Oh, this is a peer pressure thing.
00:02:12.073 --> 00:02:19.074
Yeah, Like I would have conformed to the group you know like I mean, is this a bad time to tell everyone I put roofies in the bourbon?
00:02:22.383 --> 00:02:23.586
Thank God I don't drink, I'm driving.
00:02:23.788 --> 00:02:29.145
Are we allowed you get in the captain's chair.
00:02:29.225 --> 00:02:31.150
The four o'clock across doesn't look bad.
00:02:31.150 --> 00:02:32.151
No, not at all.
00:02:32.151 --> 00:02:32.932
It fits nicely.
00:02:37.266 --> 00:02:39.818
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Take a Deep Show.
00:02:39.818 --> 00:02:42.481
Episode something, something, something, something, something, something in the triple digits.
00:02:43.425 --> 00:02:46.151
Yeah, we're at home, 12, 14, 19.
00:02:47.441 --> 00:02:49.667
We'll get around to airing that 100th episode one of these days.
00:02:49.667 --> 00:02:53.224
No, no, it's the lost episode.
00:02:53.567 --> 00:02:55.383
No, that can't even.
00:02:55.383 --> 00:02:56.687
That'll never, ever go on.
00:02:56.687 --> 00:02:57.187
You have to pay.
00:02:57.247 --> 00:03:03.568
No, you know what, on OnlyFans You've got to subscribe to see episode 100.
00:03:03.568 --> 00:03:07.270
I want you to play it at my funeral Episode 100.
00:03:07.270 --> 00:03:12.627
That is like pissing on your grave if we did that as opposed to what anyone else is going to do anyway.
00:03:14.080 --> 00:03:16.569
Do you think somebody is going to do something worse than pissing on your grave?
00:03:17.421 --> 00:03:18.389
It's distinctly possible.
00:03:18.652 --> 00:03:23.270
What's worse than that, though, is John the first guest since the incident.
00:03:23.270 --> 00:03:27.150
Oh, yes, yes, yes, I think he is.
00:03:27.150 --> 00:03:27.651
Yes, he is.
00:03:27.939 --> 00:03:31.390
Ladies and gentlemen, we have a very, very, very special guest today.
00:03:31.390 --> 00:03:35.769
He's not a one percenter, he does not ride with the angels.
00:03:35.769 --> 00:03:37.034
Nobody thought that, nope.
00:03:37.200 --> 00:03:39.616
You're not going to Colorado, nope Chicago.
00:03:39.979 --> 00:03:43.969
Nope, and the only reason that he was allowed is because he doesn't drink.
00:03:44.831 --> 00:03:48.530
Yes, and, like white girl, wasted.
00:03:50.461 --> 00:03:51.305
Oh, was that the incident?
00:03:51.305 --> 00:03:54.343
Yeah, are we going to hear about the incident?
00:03:54.343 --> 00:03:55.127
Because now I want to know.
00:03:58.403 --> 00:03:59.647
Well, can we do your intro song?
00:04:00.711 --> 00:04:00.871
Yeah.
00:04:01.819 --> 00:04:01.204
I think it's fitting, because you're what's up, Coach G.
00:04:01.204 --> 00:04:02.580
Yeah, I think it's fitting.
00:04:02.580 --> 00:04:03.985
What's up Coach G.
00:04:03.985 --> 00:04:10.419
From the last time I saw you to now, it was like you growing up in Sons of Anarchy.
00:04:10.942 --> 00:04:12.067
Bubba Joe, what's up?
00:04:12.699 --> 00:04:14.086
That's the best way to describe it.
00:04:15.463 --> 00:04:16.588
He's a young Thomas Teller.
00:04:17.161 --> 00:04:18.024
It's very close.
00:04:18.024 --> 00:04:19.105
Like you have.
00:04:19.105 --> 00:04:22.567
No, from the last time I saw him to now, yeah, never.
00:04:22.567 --> 00:04:25.680
Wasn't driving a motorcycle, didn't have the tattoos.
00:04:25.680 --> 00:04:27.204
Nope, nope.
00:04:27.204 --> 00:04:28.427
When was the last time you saw him?
00:04:28.427 --> 00:04:28.809
Last week?
00:04:28.809 --> 00:04:29.471
Shit dude.
00:04:29.471 --> 00:04:30.524
When did you?
00:04:30.524 --> 00:04:31.699
When did you leave for Carolina?
00:04:33.043 --> 00:04:34.144
Eight years ago when?
00:04:34.185 --> 00:04:34.985
Where in Carolina?
00:04:35.466 --> 00:04:35.767
Rowley.
00:04:36.108 --> 00:04:36.369
Okay.
00:04:36.949 --> 00:04:38.552
Yep Lived down there for a while and uh.
00:04:38.874 --> 00:04:44.305
So he listened to this song Down there, and now we got this, this guy.
00:04:44.605 --> 00:04:45.028
This guy.
00:04:46.894 --> 00:04:47.617
This guy yeah.
00:04:54.661 --> 00:04:55.963
It's Johnny Boom right here.
00:04:55.963 --> 00:04:57.567
Johnny Boom, johnny Boom.
00:05:01.920 --> 00:05:03.468
Wow, using him up quick man.
00:05:03.940 --> 00:05:08.569
He used three up quick last time and he was very good timing on the last one.
00:05:08.569 --> 00:05:11.749
But Johnny boom Love it, love it.
00:05:11.749 --> 00:05:15.600
Speaking of Roofied.
00:05:15.600 --> 00:05:17.225
Are you allowed to tell that story?
00:05:17.225 --> 00:05:20.199
No, you're not allowed to tell that story.
00:05:20.401 --> 00:05:21.466
Well, you fucking brought it up.
00:05:21.466 --> 00:05:24.247
Now you gotta tell it, I know, now you gotta tell it, I'm not telling that story Some things in life.
00:05:24.266 --> 00:05:25.031
Don't get on me, but this is such a.
00:05:25.050 --> 00:05:25.733
When you fucking brought it up.
00:05:25.733 --> 00:05:26.377
Now you gotta tell it.
00:05:26.377 --> 00:05:27.060
I'm not telling that story.
00:05:27.060 --> 00:05:31.105
Some things in life don't get on me, but this is such a they usually do in some
00:05:31.144 --> 00:05:32.649
shape or form, it's legendary.
00:05:32.788 --> 00:05:35.805
It's still fresh we can have Bernie's.
00:05:35.846 --> 00:05:36.709
We keep out of record.
00:05:38.341 --> 00:05:40.048
That's only because we're not sure of the statue.
00:05:41.701 --> 00:05:51.062
We can talk about Seif Dover, which we won't, just the Jeffrey.
00:05:51.141 --> 00:05:52.504
Epstein of car sales.
00:05:52.504 --> 00:05:53.086
Here we go.
00:05:53.507 --> 00:05:54.670
What are we three minutes in?
00:05:54.690 --> 00:05:56.466
Yeah, we come out swinging.
00:05:56.466 --> 00:06:00.430
Did Jim ride in the pilot in Jeffrey Epstein's hot pilot?
00:06:00.430 --> 00:06:01.824
Jim is probably like Bill Clinton who took the pilot.
00:06:01.843 --> 00:06:02.607
Maybe that's a really bad comparison.
00:06:02.607 --> 00:06:03.589
I'm not going to compare Jimmy like that.
00:06:03.589 --> 00:06:05.396
Uh, jim, jim is probably like Jimmy's probably like Bill Bill Clinton.
00:06:05.396 --> 00:06:08.086
He could be Maybe that's really bad comparison.
00:06:08.086 --> 00:06:09.504
I'm not going to compare Jimmy like that.
00:06:09.723 --> 00:06:11.689
Yeah, no, don't do that, Don't do that I just did though.
00:06:11.930 --> 00:06:16.387
I know you did but no, it's John used to.
00:06:16.387 --> 00:06:17.882
I used to work with Johnny at Honda.
00:06:17.882 --> 00:06:21.425
He was our, he was our, he was a young fucking kid.
00:06:21.425 --> 00:06:22.807
And now he comes back and he's.
00:06:23.528 --> 00:06:25.350
Left an ex-wife and got a bunch of tattoos.
00:06:26.492 --> 00:06:28.956
Oh, were you in charge of a lot of lizards?
00:06:28.956 --> 00:06:34.103
No, mr Despacito was Well, we all know how that turned out.
00:06:34.103 --> 00:06:39.088
Yeah, he had to flee to Mexico, he's not allowed back at the dealership, Mr Despacito.
00:06:39.088 --> 00:06:42.651
He's officially not allowed back, like he's blackballed yeah.
00:06:43.112 --> 00:06:44.713
Why he's officially not allowed back Like he's blackballed.
00:06:44.713 --> 00:06:47.274
Yeah, why, I don't know he just he got told to leave one day.
00:06:47.274 --> 00:06:48.495
By who, mike?
00:06:48.795 --> 00:06:49.997
Yeah, mj, yeah MJ.
00:06:51.380 --> 00:06:54.526
Yeah, so he's not allowed back, can't be within 200 years of his school.
00:06:54.547 --> 00:06:55.209
Yeah well, that'll get you.
00:06:55.879 --> 00:06:58.923
Well, I mean, nobody wants to be around an English guy who's always angry.
00:06:58.923 --> 00:07:00.745
Nah he, you bloody cunt.
00:07:00.745 --> 00:07:02.026
You bloody cunt.
00:07:02.968 --> 00:07:05.310
Oh, that would fucking irk the shit out of me.
00:07:05.391 --> 00:07:07.353
Yeah, everything he says to you sounds like he's just.
00:07:09.035 --> 00:07:14.004
Hello governor, Did anyone ever tell him they lost the fucking war.
00:07:14.124 --> 00:07:18.572
I don't know Like I'm not the toughest dude out there, but I feel like anybody with that voice I could kick the crap out of.
00:07:18.572 --> 00:07:23.225
I almost want to take a white glove and just slap him in the face Like that voice you're like what?
00:07:23.245 --> 00:07:25.232
I threatened him so many times when I was working.
00:07:25.232 --> 00:07:27.809
I was like you ever get in my face like that again.
00:07:27.809 --> 00:07:32.170
I was like I don't care if you're my If you had to threaten him more than once he didn't listen to you.
00:07:32.170 --> 00:07:38.649
No, no, or I didn't listen to him, which was mostly the part you know.
00:07:40.779 --> 00:07:41.961
That's fucking aggravating.
00:07:41.961 --> 00:07:46.264
Why Fucking accent talking shit?
00:07:47.185 --> 00:07:50.247
I worked with a dude that didn't have an accent and we shamed him.
00:07:50.267 --> 00:07:51.649
He wouldn't even come out with us anymore.
00:07:51.668 --> 00:07:53.670
What's crazy is you take him off that lot.
00:07:53.670 --> 00:07:54.750
He's the nicest dude in the world.
00:07:54.750 --> 00:07:57.312
Nicest dude in the world yeah.
00:07:57.353 --> 00:07:57.793
You bring him to.
00:07:57.834 --> 00:08:02.237
Honda and you're just like I'm going to set him and his family on fire.
00:08:02.237 --> 00:08:04.771
That's a real dick.
00:08:04.771 --> 00:08:10.341
Then no, because he was very, I would say, giving outside of Honda.
00:08:10.360 --> 00:08:10.762
How about this?
00:08:10.762 --> 00:08:12.562
Let's get him a red jacket.
00:08:12.562 --> 00:08:16.007
We'll let him run through the fucking run through the used car line.
00:08:16.007 --> 00:08:17.142
We'll shoot at him with paintballs.
00:08:19.168 --> 00:08:20.704
I love that idea.
00:08:20.723 --> 00:08:21.848
You just smack him with tea bags.
00:08:24.761 --> 00:08:26.547
How many alpacas can we rent to?
00:08:26.567 --> 00:08:30.226
have him run in Ride the alpacas and shoot them with a paintball gun.
00:08:32.600 --> 00:08:33.745
I'll never fucking see it coming.
00:08:33.980 --> 00:08:37.029
I was thinking about him running underneath the alpacas Wow.
00:08:37.200 --> 00:08:40.027
Like you put honey on the alpaca's balls and he's got to run through.
00:08:40.027 --> 00:08:48.248
Yeah, first off, it's an alpaca attack, it's an alpaca, you know know, one of those brushless car washes, but you're doing it with ball sacks.
00:08:48.268 --> 00:08:48.948
Yeah, wow, come on.
00:08:48.948 --> 00:08:51.316
Sometimes people deserve that honey on the ball.
00:08:51.336 --> 00:08:54.202
I don't know, I don't know why I came up with that.
00:08:54.202 --> 00:08:55.908
It was the first fucking thing.
00:08:56.570 --> 00:09:06.730
I have a feeling there's a fantasy in there somewhere for pat yeah, I was gonna say that sounds pretty suspect, so you know a lot about that huh, johnny, tell us us what's been going on.
00:09:06.770 --> 00:09:08.746
man, why are you back from Carolina?
00:09:08.746 --> 00:09:11.539
I mean, you could say whatever you want.
00:09:11.580 --> 00:09:13.447
Yeah, no, I needed to change.
00:09:13.447 --> 00:09:15.947
I was working for a cigar company.
00:09:15.947 --> 00:09:18.985
Which cigar company?
00:09:18.985 --> 00:09:24.711
Monte Cristo, Romeo H Utman, Should I?
00:09:29.639 --> 00:09:29.821
H Farbean.
00:09:29.821 --> 00:09:31.264
So johnny blew the surprise earlier and he's a guy, you know.
00:09:31.264 --> 00:09:31.706
He gave me something.
00:09:31.706 --> 00:09:34.104
I'm like, oh no, no, I was like, save this for the fucking show, the guys will love it.
00:09:34.244 --> 00:09:47.024
So, johnny, if you want to, yeah, hand out your special gifts gift packs oh no in the front you got a couple cigars, then inside you got an ashtray Meanwhile.
00:09:47.369 --> 00:09:51.184
I know you motherfuckers are like, oh, this is going to be a prank, you got Kevin.
00:09:51.184 --> 00:09:53.379
Oh no, thank you.
00:09:54.263 --> 00:09:54.926
You have.
00:09:55.500 --> 00:09:57.548
I'm sorry, Ben, If you're watching right now.
00:09:57.548 --> 00:10:00.388
You have just fell down a few rungs.
00:10:00.448 --> 00:10:07.961
And I figured you guys needed something else for in here, so I brought the Monte Cristo ashtray for you guys to put out somewhere, dude.
00:10:08.764 --> 00:10:10.400
Oh wow, look at you, man, wow.
00:10:10.883 --> 00:10:12.067
Alright, just take it out.
00:10:12.067 --> 00:10:12.828
I'm gonna give you the left.
00:10:13.864 --> 00:10:15.513
I'm good man, I'm covered.
00:10:16.397 --> 00:10:16.940
Matt listen.
00:10:16.940 --> 00:10:21.943
No, he's good, He'll walk right under the table and just suck you off, he could reach the bottom of the table.
00:10:21.943 --> 00:10:22.365
Suck you off.
00:10:22.365 --> 00:10:22.667
No, that's okay.
00:10:22.667 --> 00:10:23.991
His head won't hit the bottom of the table.
00:10:23.991 --> 00:10:26.604
I brought shit for later.
00:10:26.624 --> 00:10:27.288
Yeah, you got cutters too.
00:10:27.288 --> 00:10:28.095
Oh, these are fucking fantastic.
00:10:28.095 --> 00:10:28.759
These are great fucking strokes.
00:10:29.659 --> 00:10:31.706
What Johnny got us was it's a.
00:10:31.706 --> 00:10:34.544
I don't know if I'm going to wear the satchel, open it up.
00:10:34.566 --> 00:10:35.879
Yeah, look, you got other stuff in here too.
00:10:35.899 --> 00:10:38.504
If I'm going to wear the satchel like Alan did in.
00:10:39.745 --> 00:10:41.087
This is a cutter.
00:10:41.828 --> 00:10:42.730
That's a heavy cutter.
00:10:42.850 --> 00:10:44.653
And then this is a Monty Ashtray.
00:10:44.653 --> 00:10:47.105
It's like a little car, one that you can put in your cup holder.
00:10:47.822 --> 00:10:49.327
That's fucking awesome.
00:10:49.327 --> 00:10:51.365
The only gift Ben gave us.
00:10:51.405 --> 00:10:52.308
Thank you so much.
00:10:54.024 --> 00:10:57.125
The only gift Ben gave us was a show of White Girl Wasted.
00:11:00.408 --> 00:11:01.792
The only thing I got was late to work.
00:11:01.792 --> 00:11:08.225
I can't explain that shit.
00:11:08.760 --> 00:11:13.633
And you got this changed man to my right who him and I used to have so much fucking fun.
00:11:13.633 --> 00:11:16.363
Oh, that's fucking awesome At Honda and dude.
00:11:16.363 --> 00:11:17.366
I can't even thank you enough.
00:11:17.366 --> 00:11:19.225
This is a fucking awesome gift.
00:11:19.225 --> 00:11:22.662
Absolutely Thanks for having me, dude.
00:11:22.662 --> 00:11:24.089
This is fucking great bro.
00:11:24.846 --> 00:11:27.186
Are you just back visiting, or are you like back up here now?
00:11:27.400 --> 00:11:28.264
No, yeah, I live here now.
00:11:28.264 --> 00:11:28.986
I live here full time.
00:11:28.986 --> 00:11:30.840
I wish I was an alcoholic.
00:11:32.404 --> 00:11:34.210
Well, I am, I could use two.
00:11:35.465 --> 00:11:36.187
I know you do that.
00:11:36.187 --> 00:11:38.684
That's fucking sweet dude, yeah, man.
00:11:39.464 --> 00:11:41.013
Dude, thank you so much.
00:11:41.013 --> 00:11:42.139
That's fucking wild.